Breaking Bad Habits: Strategies for Lasting Change

Have you ever promised yourself – perhaps on a Sunday or at the end of the year – that you would achieve a goal in the next few weeks or months? You made a plan and created a new routine, but after the initial motivation wore off and your willpower faded, you found yourself slipping back into your usual behavior. It’s a common and frustrating experience.

In this blog post, I’ll share some strategies to help you break free from bad habits, heal from the past, and create new, lasting routines that will help you achieve your goals and become the person you’ve always wanted to be.

How to Break Bad Habits and Create Lasting Change

Here are some strategies and steps to help you succeed:

Awareness

What can you do to break bad habits and develop new, healthy routines that align with your life purpose and boundaries?

We often focus on what we want without considering what we need to do (or change) to get there. In her book How to do the work: Recognize your patterns, heal from your past, and create your self, holistic psychologist Dr. Nicole LePera explains that the first step to change and healing is awareness.

Holistic psychology focuses on the mind, body, and soul to rebalance the body and nervous system and heal unresolved emotional wounds. This approach empowers you to transform into the person you’ve always been at your core.

By breaking negative patterns, healing your past, and creating your conscious self, you can transform your life. You will experience a physical, psychological, and spiritual awakening.

How to Develop Awareness

• Start small: Try to be fully present while brushing your teeth, taking a shower, doing the dishes, doing the laundry, eating, or drinking your coffee.
• Make a conscious choice to be totally aware and fully experience each moment.
• Take a few minutes to really smell, taste, feel, or see something in your environment.
• Actively bring your full attention to these sensory experiences.
• Afterward, acknowledge what just happened and thank yourself for taking those few minutes.
• Repeat this exercise daily and incorporate more activities as you become more comfortable.

Yoga as a Tool for Brain Rewiring

Research shows that practices like yoga and meditation, which help us focus on the present moment, are particularly powerful in restructuring the brain.

Yoga engages both mind and body by combining the regulating power of our breath with movement. It can be a useful way to train your brain to stay in the present moment by focusing your attention on your breath and challenging, slow body movements.

Be Aware of the Power of Your Thoughts

Our thoughts influence our emotions and ultimately our behaviors. By changing our relationship with our thoughts, we alter the cascade of emotions that flood our bodies and persuade us to act in certain ways.

Know Yourself

Do you truly know who you are? Are your behaviors and career choices genuinely reflective of your own desires, or are they shaped by what you thought others wanted you to do?

In order to change, you have to learn who you really are. This journey often involves reconnecting with your inner child and rediscovering your natural talents and passions. This process allows you to reconnect with aspects of yourself that you may have forgotten or put aside.

We all have a natural talent. Do you know yours?

Think back to what you loved doing repeatedly as a child. Did you enjoy running, reading, playing with animals, or drawing? If you can’t remember, ask your grandparents, aunts, or neighbors. Our natural talents have been with us since childhood, and rediscovering them can be a source of joy and satisfaction.

Sometimes our parents might miss recognizing these talents. They may have had hopes for us to take over their businesses or realize their dreams. In her book How to Do the Work: Recognize Your Patterns, Heal from Your Past, and Create Your Self, Dr. Nicole LePera mentions:

It’s very common for parent-figures to project their own unresolved traumas onto their children. When even well-meaning parent-figures react under the influence of their own unconscious wounds, they, instead of offering guidance, may attempt to control, micromanage, or coerce a child to follow their will. Some of these attempts may be well-intentioned. Parent-figures may consciously or unconsciously want to keep the child safe and protected from the world so that the child will not experience the pain that they, themselves, have. In the process, they may negate the child’s wants and needs. Even when this can seem intentional, these reactions often stem from their own deep-rooted pain, which may not be visible on the surface.

Many parents, with the best of intentions, may guide their children based on their own experiences and dreams. This can sometimes lead to a career path that aligns more with their hopes rather than the child’s true desires. Recognizing this can be the first step towards discovering what truly makes you happy.

If you find yourself wishing you were doing something else every day at work, ask yourself: What is it? What is your flow activity? Define it and write it down. Identifying what you’re passionate about and what activities make you lose track of time is the key to a more fulfilling professional and personal life.

Only by becoming consciously aware of your habits and thought patterns can you begin to live a life that is authentically yours.

Be Confident

Once you have identified your talents and hobbies, be confident about them.

If you haven’t identified your unique talents yet but have a specific skill you wish to cultivate, develop a plan to achieve it. Research the available resources in this area. Read blogs and books about it, and ask colleagues or friends who have achieved similar goals. Connect with people on LinkedIn, social media, or other online platforms. Nowadays, it is very easy to establish new relationships with people thanks to the internet and various communication methods.

Be confident in yourself. Know what you want, and believe that you will achieve it.

Set Boundaries

• Boundaries protect your well-being. They form the essential framework for all your relationships, especially the one you maintain with yourself.
• Master the art of saying no without feeling the need to apologize. Give yourself permission to say no when it serves you.
• Identify your desires, recognize your limits, and communicate them effectively.
• Understand your own emotional boundaries and communicate them to others without fear or shame.
• Discipline is vital for healing. It empowers you to consistently show up for yourself.
• Cultivate boundaries through consistent discipline. Honor small commitments to yourself and build daily routines and habits.

Embrace Discomfort

There are no shortcuts or magic solutions. Real change takes time, effort, and hard work. Understand that change is not easy, and the road ahead will sometimes be rough.

Habits, or things we do repeatedly, become the default mode of the subconscious mind. The subconscious mind loves to exist in a comfort zone or the familiar because they are predictable and feel safe. Even when an emotion makes us feel stressed or sad, it often feels familiar and safe because it provides the same kind of relief we experienced as children.

Every time we make a choice that is outside of our default programming, our subconscious mind will attempt to pull us back to the familiar by creating mental resistance. This resistance can manifest as both mental and physical discomfort, such as procrastination, anxiety, agitation, or repetitive thoughts. This is just your subconscious communicating that it is uncomfortable with the new territory of these proposed changes.

The familiar feels safe until we teach ourselves that discomfort is only temporary and a necessary part of growth and change.

Accept and Learn From Failure

Understand that mistakes and failures are part of the learning process. Instead of becoming discouraged, use these experiences as opportunities to grow and improve.

Celebrate Your Successes

Recognize and celebrate your successes, no matter how small. Each accomplishment is a step forward and proof that you are capable of achieving your goals.

Develop a Realistic Routine

Create a routine that you can stick to, even when your emotions fluctuate. Break down your goals into manageable steps that support daily choices aligned with your desired future outcome.

Morning Ritual

• Start your day with activities that center your mind and body. Do breathing exercises or meditation.
• Write down affirmations, positive thoughts, or quotes to set a positive tone for the day.
• Write about how you are feeling and how great the day will be.
• Reprogram your brain. How do you usually describe yourself? Which words follow after “I am…”? If the answer is “late,” “lazy,” “fat,” “ugly,” or any other similar negative adjectives, change them to “beautiful,” “organized,” “happy,” “healthy,” “loved.” Complete the phrase with the way you want to feel or with what you want to achieve: “I am calm, I respect myself, I can follow rules and routines,” etc.

Evening Reflection

• At night, reflect on the positive aspects of your day. Be thankful for being alive, healthy, having a warm bed, food, loving parents, and the most beautiful dog or children (or both). Write down everything that went well today and express gratitude for what you have.
• Plan for tomorrow: Add your plans for the next day and note what you can improve. Plan your meals, the tasks you will complete at work, and so on.

Daily Intentions

The goal is to remind yourself daily of your intention to change and your goals.

Start a new simple habit or add it to an existing one, like drinking water after waking up or flossing after brushing your teeth every night. The key is to do something every day.

Repetition will create new pathways in your brain, making it easier to notice and adopt new behaviors or thoughts over time. By consistently practicing, you reinforce these new habits, making them more automatic and effortless.

Self-Care

Take time for yourself every day. Listen to your favorite song, go dancing, read a book, do a puzzle, play a game, exercise — find something that boosts your energy and do it daily.

Incorporate Physical Activity Into Your Routine

Walk your dog, combine work and exercise by walking on a treadmill desk, do yoga, Pilates, stretching, or strength training. Choose activities that match your fitness level and preferences.

If you love to dance, find a dance school nearby. You could also join a tennis club or play football or basketball with your friends. If possible, take a few minutes each day to walk outside and appreciate nature. Find something you enjoy and do it regularly.

Physical exercise deepens sleep and improves mood by releasing neurochemicals in the brain, including dopamine, serotonin, and norepinephrine. These chemicals make you feel happier and less stressed.

For me, using a treadmill desk was revolutionary. I meet my daily step goal and simultaneously boost my creativity and brain function while working. I also go to the gym three times a week for strength training and recently started doing yoga. Yoga is totally changing the way I see the world, as it helps me stay centered and calm through breath work and slow movements. It provides a total reset and a mental energy boost.

Pay Attention to Your Diet

Be aware of how your diet affects your body and mental state. Eat whole, nutrient-dense foods. Learn more on this topic in the interviews with Kevin Harscheidt and Marius Nguedia.

Ensure Good Sleep

Not getting enough sleep is incredibly harmful. When we sleep, our bodies repair themselves. Our gut gets a chance to take a break from digestion, our brain clears out toxins and waste, and our cells regenerate. All of our body’s organs and systems, including the nervous system, benefit from sleep. Sleep is key to both mental and physical health.

Read more on this topic in our articles: How to Improve the Quality of Your Sleep and How to Use 1Focus for a Distraction-Free Sleep Environment.

Willpower Has Its Limits

In the beginning, we are always motivated, but the bigger the goal, the harder it is and the longer it will take. Big achievements usually take time, which is often why we stop halfway. For example, nobody loses 20 kilos in a month in a healthy way. You have to understand and internalize that whatever the goal, it will take time and effort.

The best way to stay on track is to develop a routine and maintain discipline. You probably brush your teeth and shower at the same time every day without even realizing it. This is something you have been doing for a long time, and your body does it automatically without thinking.

As psychologist, performance coach, and holistic health expert Kate Otte mentioned in our interview: Any behavior you want to integrate into your life long-term must become a routine. Routines are very low in energy – that means it doesn’t cost the brain much energy to follow this “well-laid path” – once a behavior becomes routine, you’ll effortlessly do it daily.

Choose Your Friends Carefully

The people you spend time with can influence your decisions in both good and bad ways.

If you have had a behavior for a long time and want to implement a healthy habit or achieve a big goal, you expect the people closest to you to support your decision and cheer you on. Unfortunately, this is usually not the case. Whenever we change our behavior and develop healthy boundaries, we will always encounter resistance. Sadly, sometimes it comes from those closest to us.

They are used to having us always available or participating in the same old, toxic behavior. So if you suddenly decide not to drink at a party, stop smoking, go to bed early, or just eat a salad instead of a burger, you may get comments like, “You have changed” or “Just one won’t hurt.” Remember, these comments are more about their comfort zones than your choices. Stay focused on your goals and stick to your plan.

Surround Yourself With People Who Have Similar Goals and Interests

Positive, active people will lift you up, provide support, and offer new ideas when needed. Share your aspirations with them and learn from their experiences.

Value and Respect Others

Be grateful for every one of your true friends. Having a supportive community will boost your mental and physical health. You’ll be happier, healthier, and live longer.

Be Mindful of Your Consumption of Information

Think about how you feel after reading the news, checking social media, or surfing the Internet. Do you feel relaxed or stressed out?

Make an effort to take a break from digital devices every day, especially before bed, to avoid the negative emotions they can cause.

Shape Your Environment for Success

Ensure you stay focused by limiting access to non-essential digital content.

• Use 1Focus: Block distracting apps and websites like YouTube, online games, and social media during working hours.
• Allow only specific websites: Enable access only to the websites you need for work or study to promote monotasking.
• Block the Internet: Prevent access to the App Store and installed web browsers to eliminate online distractions.
• Block digital distractions during sleeping hours.

Conclusion

Achieving lasting change and breaking free from old habits requires a multifaceted approach that includes awareness, self-discovery, confidence, and a willingness to embrace discomfort.

By developing realistic routines, practicing self-care, and being mindful of your environment and relationships, you can create new, healthy habits that align with your true self and life goals.

Real change takes time and effort, but with consistent practice and a supportive community, you can transform your life and become the person you’ve always wanted to be.

Further Reading

You may also like: Expert Advice: The Secrets of Lasting Motivation

For a deeper understanding of holistic healing, breaking negative patterns, and transforming your life through mind, body, and soul integration, consider reading How to Do the Work: Recognize Your Patterns, Heal from Your Past, and Create Your Self by Dr. Nicole LePera.

The information provided in this post is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical advice.